We hired the village hall for the reception, and had the do catered. The hall had no bar, so any booze had to be brought by us. Brian and I had bought the champagne in France, for the toasts, and the rest was up to my Dad to organise.

A few days before the wedding, I asked him what he had got for the 120 guests to drink (you can see, I was minutely involved in the planning … not!). He told me he had still water, sparkling water, orange juice, apple juice etc etc. I gently pointed out, this was a wedding, and people would expect some alcohol as well.

So we had 2 x 2 litre bottles of Liebfraumilch as well, to add to the list.

Now you can understand why the £1,500 insurance policy paid for the wedding, can't you?! But the thing is, it was moments like these that made the day stand out.

In our local paper, there were two brides who got married at the same church one after the other. They had both bought the same “exclusive” dress from a bridal shop and been assured that it was unique. Because one of the weddings had run a bit late, they met each other outside the church and saw their dresses were identical. One bride was on anti-depressants and complained that her wedding was ruined. The other said “well, it was a disappointment, but it was only a dress”. I'm with the second one.

I advised my brother to have a wedding where everything would go wrong, because that's the wedding you remember, not the one that goes like clockwork.