You think working with Gordon Brown is bad…
…I wouldn’t want to work with Jack Bauer.
With Gordon Brown allegedly being a workplace bully, I stopped to think – are there other people I wouldn’t want to work with? What makes a work place bully? Is it their passion not being contained? Is it their enthusiasm knowing no boundaries? Is it the unrelenting focus on getting the job done? or is it something else? is it the job?
Clinical psychopaths can easily fly through an interview procedure and often rise to high office within a company – should they be weeded out before they have a lot of responsibility?
So, who wouldn’t I want to work with?
I wouldn’t want to be so ill that Dr Greg House would insult me, correctly accuse me of lying, break into my house, find some mould growing underneath my underwear drawer, 9/10ths kill me and make me grateful to be alive. I’d rather die. Truly, I would.
From his employees point of view – How does Dr Foreman cope? How do you balance the learning opportunity of working for House and working within medical guidelines, as well as keeping your soul? Does all that he save justify his working actions? If House wasn’t a Doctor, he’d be a banker 
I wouldn’t want to work in Eastenders where after a week of appearances, a long lost child (that I don’t recall giving birth to) will arrive to make my life hell, and if I survived that, Janine or Stacey would just bludgeon me to death (when I wasn’t looking) in the Vic. It’s a wonder anyone works in that pub! It seems the only places of employment are the pub, the garage and the cafe. I wouldn’t want to get married in Eastenders either, cos it will only end in tears or an affair with Ian Beale. I’d rather be treated by House!
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I certainly wouldn’t want to work for Jack Bauer.
Have you noticed when he takes a team out of the office very few of them come back alive? Can you imagine how many CTU agents are hiding under their desks? avoiding going on a mission with him…
God help me if I was in charge and he was called in to help me, I’d have just a few hours before he puts a bullet in me to save the world! And if I was the love interest, I know I’d be lucky to survive a series without kidnapping and some sort of torture!
Poor Jack, have you noticed how he is an albatross to every President he serves? If I became President, my first order would be to have a hit put out on Jack, cos I know if I don’t I’ll lose friends, family and the Eastern seaboard to terrorists and all my administration would turn against me overnight…
Does he ever wonder if he’d run into his Dad in the White House? Is that why he doesn’t go there very often? Would the Speaker of the House in Commander in Chief tell Jack off?
In real life, do they talk about work over dinner?
Kiefer “I diverted a Nuke the other day dad, on the orders of a woman President”
Donald “I thwarted a plan to put millions into Medicare… Darn women Presidents”
Kiefer ” You win Dad, I can’t top that, although I shall mention it to the script writers for next season, maybe a terrorist could launch a nuke at the White House”
Donald “Haven’t you diverted the Nuke on the White House once before Son?”
Lost, I love Lost. Working for the Dharma Initiative or Charles Widmore, it’s like being caught between the proverbial rock and hard place. Employers in Lost don’t exactly have a good record when it comes to workplace safety…
Interviewee: so why are you recruiting for a new Doctor?
Interviewer: The last one died. At work.
Interviewee: I am sorry to hear that. How did it happen?
Interviewer: She set off a nuclear bomb in a drill shaft.
Interviewee: So it’s dangerous working for you then?
Interviewer: The previous one died of radiation poisoning, several are trapped in the past, and some come back a little deranged. But it was there own faults, no one made them take the job. when can you start?
Interviewee: Err, Err… who will be my boss?
Interviewer: A nice chap called Ben Linus, never has staffing issues, well not since he allowed his own daughter to be shot
Lost also teaches you that what you see, isn’t what it seems and that team work is paramount -Being on your own in Lost is fast track to being dead. I wouldn’t fancy working for any one of them either.
Alias, I love Alias. I watch all five series at least once a year. Don’t you just wish that Jack Bristow was your dad? Working with family can be tough, but in Alias it’s rewarding, Dad protects you and you get a good looking handler to marry as they are the only one who will understand the pressure of your job. Is there any language Sydney can’t speak? Is there any building that Marshall can’t break into? Syd keeps her cool despite the pressure. Again, you don’t want to be close to these people, Syd’s lip would quiver and she’d put a bullet in you without a moment’s hesitation if her job demanded it.
If I were President, it would be Jack out of the door and Sydney in, she leaves more people alive. Only just.
Which brings me onto the West Wing. If I could employ any two people it would be CJ and Charlie. Understandably their environment is pressurised, but they work to the best of their ability. They don’t scream, throw things at people, they are professionals and public servants. They would totally sort my working life out. Is there anything Charlie doesn’t know? Is there anything CJ cannot get away with in the press room?
Yes, I know they are only TV show places of employment… I buy a boxset and lose myself in their lives for a few hours (except for Eastenders, am forced to listen to it when my soap junkie daughter watches it). I get caught up in their worlds and wonder how they cope.
Can a working environment impact on how an employee performs? Is it like property, location, location, location? Or is there something else? are there personality traits? are driven people more prone to workplace violence?
What makes good TV makes an unpleasant working environment.
What If… Jack and House worked on Eastenders, would they be different? Could they take Ian Beale on a mission? 
If Jack didn’t kill ‘em, House could finish them off and CJ could give it a real positive spin to keep us watching for another week
Please note although this blog is a lighthearted piece of writing, work place bullying destroys lives and comes in many forms. Women in particular can be deeply affected by it. No matter how trivial it starts, it will blow up out of your hands quickly – nip it in the bud, talk to someone impartial, keep a diary, seek advice. Do something.
About Sarah ArrowSarah Arrow is the managing editor of Birds on the Blog, in real life she is the communications director of a same day courier service. She is an enthusiastic UK based pro-blogger and co- author of the soon to be published Zero to Blogger
View all posts by Sarah Arrow →
36 Responses to You think working with Gordon Brown is bad…
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Hmmm, it’s an interesting question.
I think I’d be prepared to take the risk to work with Jack Bauer…just about
And if the opportunity to work with the writerly equivalent of House came up, I’d be prepared to take any amount of abuse…if it made my writing better
I’m not sure that just being loud and yelling in frustration counts as bullying though – although to some timid people it may feel like it. Going back in time I can imagine that some people would be traumatised by living with the family in Roseanne for instance…
And with some people it’s when they go quiet you have to watch out. Real bullying can also be a very quiet and insidious process of undermining.
I do agree with your examples from the West Wing though. CJ was one of my favourite characters
Yelling and frustration can seem like bullying when people are ill equipped to cope with the workplace. Sometimes people need to stop and consider the impact of their actions upon others, and to me, House has tremendous focus but considers the impact of his behaviour rarely.
I can just see you in one of those Algonquin writers circles sharing your wit
Oh, yummy, Hugh Laurie
:
Do you reckon we’d have fun dealing with the House character? Where the heck would we start? How much pain (if you’ll ignore the awful pun) would it be worth?
His alter, earlier egos as the dim witted aristo in Blackadder or Bertie would be equally annoying but oh, so much easier to cope with – and no bullying issues involved…
Twitter: Linda_Mattacks
It would be worth very little pain to me Linda, I couldn’t work with the man or be his patient. I could however….
Hmmm, it’s an interesting question.
I think I’d be prepared to take the risk to work with Jack Bauer…just about
And if the opportunity to work with the writerly equivalent of House came up, I’d be prepared to take any amount of abuse…if it made my writing better
I’m not sure that just being loud and yelling in frustration counts as bullying though – although to some timid people it may feel like it. Going back in time I can imagine that some people would be traumatised by living with the family in Roseanne for instance…
And with some people it’s when they go quiet you have to watch out. Real bullying can also be a very quiet and insidious process of undermining.
I do agree with your examples from the West Wing though. CJ was one of my favourite characters
Yelling and frustration can seem like bullying when people are ill equipped to cope with the workplace. Sometimes people need to stop and consider the impact of their actions upon others, and to me, House has tremendous focus but considers the impact of his behaviour rarely.
I can just see you in one of those Algonquin writers circles sharing your wit
Oh, yummy, Hugh Laurie
:
Do you reckon we’d have fun dealing with the House character? Where the heck would we start? How much pain (if you’ll ignore the awful pun) would it be worth?
His alter, earlier egos as the dim witted aristo in Blackadder or Bertie would be equally annoying but oh, so much easier to cope with – and no bullying issues involved…
Twitter: Linda_Mattacks
It would be worth very little pain to me Linda, I couldn’t work with the man or be his patient. I could however….
seriously funny!
On the serious bit, I’ve worked for a few bullies and I reckon its true that many driven business people are prone to this trait; they often have the capability themselves of making things happen at a frightening pace and have far too high expectations of those who work for them. It can make people’s live seriously miserable – but for them, achieving their goals is paramount and staff casualties (did you mention Casualty?) are probably just an unfortunate bi-product.
On the funny side, this was a really enjoyable read Sarah – how on earth do you manage to digest so much TV as well as everything else? I trust you’re already working on your first TV script?;)
I didnt mention Casualty as I have never watched it, the only ‘hospital’ tv series I have ever watched is House.
As for the TV, I have taken up Insomnia recently
No I lied, I have watched one episode of Casualty, where a former barmen I had employed was in it, he got run over by his lover and it was all very fraught, and he was playing a teen when he was 29….
seriously funny!
On the serious bit, I’ve worked for a few bullies and I reckon its true that many driven business people are prone to this trait; they often have the capability themselves of making things happen at a frightening pace and have far too high expectations of those who work for them. It can make people’s live seriously miserable – but for them, achieving their goals is paramount and staff casualties (did you mention Casualty?) are probably just an unfortunate bi-product.
On the funny side, this was a really enjoyable read Sarah – how on earth do you manage to digest so much TV as well as everything else? I trust you’re already working on your first TV script?;)
I didnt mention Casualty as I have never watched it, the only ‘hospital’ tv series I have ever watched is House.
As for the TV, I have taken up Insomnia recently
No I lied, I have watched one episode of Casualty, where a former barmen I had employed was in it, he got run over by his lover and it was all very fraught, and he was playing a teen when he was 29….
Love your article, Sarah
I used to work for a man who was (and no doubt still is) a bully. He is actually a very nice guy who is 100% driven by his work, expects to be in the office 7am-10pm and therefore doesn’t understand why everyone else doesn’t. One of his staff had not taken any time off on holiday in five years (and was single – no wonder); another one, married, eventually disappeared for two weeks when he had a nervous breakdown.
I found it very stressful working for him, because I refused to do the excessive hours and refused to give him my mobile number “just in case” (yeah, right, Ian, I know you think nothing of calling at 2am!).
He WAS a bully, but he didn’t mean it.
Brown, on the other hand, is a nasty piece of work.
For him it was the intense focus on his work that made him a bully, albeit unintentionally. Did he work for himself or for a company? I ask I as wonder if it was the underlying culture that encouraged this behaviour, or perhaps he molded the company to fit his personality trait?
He moulded the company to fit his personality trait. All the other partners were as driven insane by him as we staff were. Eventually, he left to set up on his own, which no doubt worked better for his clients and for him. I imagine his poor wife ended up having a nervous breakdown, though, with him based in the house from then on.
Love your article, Sarah
I used to work for a man who was (and no doubt still is) a bully. He is actually a very nice guy who is 100% driven by his work, expects to be in the office 7am-10pm and therefore doesn’t understand why everyone else doesn’t. One of his staff had not taken any time off on holiday in five years (and was single – no wonder); another one, married, eventually disappeared for two weeks when he had a nervous breakdown.
I found it very stressful working for him, because I refused to do the excessive hours and refused to give him my mobile number “just in case” (yeah, right, Ian, I know you think nothing of calling at 2am!).
He WAS a bully, but he didn’t mean it.
Brown, on the other hand, is a nasty piece of work.
For him it was the intense focus on his work that made him a bully, albeit unintentionally. Did he work for himself or for a company? I ask I as wonder if it was the underlying culture that encouraged this behaviour, or perhaps he molded the company to fit his personality trait?
He moulded the company to fit his personality trait. All the other partners were as driven insane by him as we staff were. Eventually, he left to set up on his own, which no doubt worked better for his clients and for him. I imagine his poor wife ended up having a nervous breakdown, though, with him based in the house from then on.
Great post, Sarah!
My first ever boss (in a fulltime job) was a terrible bully. He’d rant and bellow at us in the Monday morning update meetings that we all dreaded. And if you were unlucky enough to be visited in your office by him you knew you were up for a b*ll*cking … he’d glance around at everything on your desk, looking for something to pick on to give him an excuse to shout at you.
I was 19 at the time and pretty naive, but soon moved on. He went on to make millions, lose them all, make them again, lose them again. By the time he was in his late forties he was drinking 2 bottles of whisky a day and chain-smoking cigars.
I met up with him again when, at the age of 50, he had metastatic cancer of the throat. We went out for dinner together and I had to help him mush up his food so he could swallow it. I was soooo tempted to remind him then of how he used to bully me and everyone else who worked for him, but I didn’t.
By now he was thin, weak, meek and submissive – what in the past would have been called “a beaten man,” finally shouted down by his own schizophrenic cell division. A horrible irony. He died about two weeks later.
Strikes me that most bullies have big personal issues they’d rather not acknowledge … and many are dreadful cowards underneath all the effing and blinding.
Funny old life, innit.
Twitter: SuzeStMWrites
Indeed a funny old life Suze. It’s sad too.
Great post, Sarah!
My first ever boss (in a fulltime job) was a terrible bully. He’d rant and bellow at us in the Monday morning update meetings that we all dreaded. And if you were unlucky enough to be visited in your office by him you knew you were up for a b*ll*cking … he’d glance around at everything on your desk, looking for something to pick on to give him an excuse to shout at you.
I was 19 at the time and pretty naive, but soon moved on. He went on to make millions, lose them all, make them again, lose them again. By the time he was in his late forties he was drinking 2 bottles of whisky a day and chain-smoking cigars.
I met up with him again when, at the age of 50, he had metastatic cancer of the throat. We went out for dinner together and I had to help him mush up his food so he could swallow it. I was soooo tempted to remind him then of how he used to bully me and everyone else who worked for him, but I didn’t.
By now he was thin, weak, meek and submissive – what in the past would have been called “a beaten man,” finally shouted down by his own schizophrenic cell division. A horrible irony. He died about two weeks later.
Strikes me that most bullies have big personal issues they’d rather not acknowledge … and many are dreadful cowards underneath all the effing and blinding.
Funny old life, innit.
Twitter: SuzeStMWrites
Indeed a funny old life Suze. It’s sad too.
I have often wondered whether bullying is all about insecurity on the part of the bully? The need to be in control and if the bully is in a power of authority chances are they will abuse their power.
Is Gordon Brown a bully? I don’t know him but I very much doubt it
Twitter: ethnicsupplies
I don’t know him either, but I’d suggest he’s a child rather than a bully. His behaviour looks much more like temper tantrums than bullying. On the other hand, if there’s one person who’s insecure, it’s our Gordon…
I don’t know him either Ida, but I do know if this was a business accused of bullying they would be paying through the nose after these kind of allegations, yet he is walking away from them and people are justifying his behaviour – even Sarah Brown is now saying he is a lovely man… it would be so much more believable if he just called an inquiry and said he couldn’t comment until it was over.
As usual there is lots of bullying going on – look how he and Mandelson have behaved to Christine Pratt, David Kelly keeps springing to mind.
oooh! David Kelly, God only knows what he had to endure poor soul.
My only quarrel with Mrs Prat is the way that way she went about this. Those poor sods that rang the help line may lose their jobs too if it true that there is bullying going on at number 10
Twitter: ethnicsupplies
I have often wondered whether bullying is all about insecurity on the part of the bully? The need to be in control and if the bully is in a power of authority chances are they will abuse their power.
Is Gordon Brown a bully? I don’t know him but I very much doubt it
Twitter: ethnicsupplies
I don’t know him either, but I’d suggest he’s a child rather than a bully. His behaviour looks much more like temper tantrums than bullying. On the other hand, if there’s one person who’s insecure, it’s our Gordon…
I don’t know him either Ida, but I do know if this was a business accused of bullying they would be paying through the nose after these kind of allegations, yet he is walking away from them and people are justifying his behaviour – even Sarah Brown is now saying he is a lovely man… it would be so much more believable if he just called an inquiry and said he couldn’t comment until it was over.
As usual there is lots of bullying going on – look how he and Mandelson have behaved to Christine Pratt, David Kelly keeps springing to mind.
oooh! David Kelly, God only knows what he had to endure poor soul.
My only quarrel with Mrs Prat is the way that way she went about this. Those poor sods that rang the help line may lose their jobs too if it true that there is bullying going on at number 10
Twitter: ethnicsupplies
Back to the serious note of this post:
Do we want another on bullying (persecution), victims and rescuers? Are we interested in knowing more about the games people play and our own roles in each scenario?
If the answer is “Yes” I’m happy to start it off from an ( believe) totally pragmatic point of view that folks can carve up any which way works?
If “No” that’s cool…
Twitter: Linda_Mattacks
A games people play blog? excellent idea… get writing…. *cracks whip very loudly*
Back to the serious note of this post:
Do we want another on bullying (persecution), victims and rescuers? Are we interested in knowing more about the games people play and our own roles in each scenario?
If the answer is “Yes” I’m happy to start it off from an ( believe) totally pragmatic point of view that folks can carve up any which way works?
If “No” that’s cool…
Twitter: Linda_Mattacks
A games people play blog? excellent idea… get writing…. *cracks whip very loudly*